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  1. “We all know that, behind closed doors, conservatives are the freakiest of all. I’m guessing they account for over 90% of gimp mask sales.”

    [hiding gimp mask behind back, trying to look nonchalant]

  2. The Hollywood stereotype you think you resemble, benson, is the “adorable old cantankerous fart” but the reality is just the last word.

  3. “I’m glad France invented foie gras.”

    Are you saying S-K’s goose is cooked?

    “Judge me by what I can do for America now, rather than only by my mistakes in the past.”

    Are you running for office, Pete? Trying to win back the dog lover vote?

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