Open Thread

“greasy hairball”

Nice!

Ok…we’ve clearly hit ‘non-sequitur hour’ here on the OT. Nothing is making any sense at all. Are you all drinking already?

this is good…

ABOUT ME: ah. if i met myself i’d think i was total idiot. so i’m not gonna tell you about me. instead i will give you my guide to on How To Dance:

– find your people, find a place. anywhere will do as long as the music is LOUD. you want to feel it in your kidneys, not your ears.

– beginners: the booty is where it’s at. do your duty to your booty.

– if you’re not feeling the music yet, drink more. booze exists to help you dance to music you don’t really like.

– if you’re not sweating, you’re doing it wrong. shake it like you hate it.

– spill your drink. it’s ok! it’s also ok to spill other people’s drinks. a wet dancefloor increases dancing options and helps you pretend you are in a Jay Z video.

– it’s ok if other people laugh at your dancing. it means you have your own style – do not abandon it. it will eventually blossom into something unique and powerful. awesome moves are the best revenge. move closer to the speaker and drink more.

– strive to be Ridiculous but try not to be Ironic. ironic dancing can very quickly become your actual dancing. this is not a crisis, but… come on hotstuff, you’re better than that.

– take drugs and encourage your friends to do the same, especially the shy ones.

– while you are dancing you may want to tell people stuff. that’s OK. grab a stranger and let it out. the dancefloor is a holy place and you are speaking in tongues.

– if you fall over, it’s OK. look around. you might find money or drugs or a new friend for life down there.

– don’t dance to try to be sexy. if you have followed the above rules you ARE sexy. in dancing, as with many things, enthusiasm is more important than technique.

– don’t fucking stop. keep going louder harder faster till you are nothing and all you can feel is noise. submit to the music – that is what you came here for. no fucking human being can make you forget yourself like that. surrender to be free.

– if you puke down yourself, it’s over. go home.

er… guess that’s it. i really have no idea what i’m saying… but i think i just found a whole new deeper level of shallowness. anyway. see you on the floor.

“obviously it won’t be enforced.”

Rob, I’m sure you’re right. Just like there is no enforcement of the leash laws and illegal parking of church goers on the weekends that blocks traffic and bike lanes. Just not popular things for a politician to push for.

Last night I went to the Irish music night at my local. I took a seat and the woman next to me asked if I had a good view. We began talking.

Hour 1: Her: “A lot of my friends are Toisan.”
Me: “Really? I learned that term just three hours ago.”

Hour 2: Her: “This song they’re playing, my grandfather used to play it late at night. It’s really obscure.”
Me: “It has lyrics right? It goes [I sing the first verse to her].”
Her: Oh my god!”

Hour 3: Her: “What’s you name? And your last name? Oh my god! That’s the same name of the town where my father grew up!”

Hour 4: Her: “Let me buy you a hotdog at Bark.”

Hour 5: Her: “Let me give you my number and my email. You’re going to email me right? Are you sure? Really, you will email won’t you?”