Contractors & Chauvinism
Chauvinism is bad for business. The second largest group to purchase homes, after married couples,are single women. On my block alone at least a third of the homeowners are single women. BTW this is the group that by and large started CHNA which spearheaded the Landmarking of Crown Heights North…yes the core group (the Board)…
Chauvinism is bad for business.
The second largest group to purchase homes, after married couples,are single women. On my block alone at least a third of the homeowners are single women. BTW this is the group that by and large started CHNA which spearheaded the Landmarking of Crown Heights North…yes the core group (the Board) was mainly women.
While it may seem archaic to post on gender inequality the fact remains that in spite of our buying power many contractors/building supply vendors make inappropriate remarks and behave in offensive ways that frankly will continue to loose them business, at least mine.
Todays’s event prompted this post.
During a transaction at the electrical supply store on Rogers and Licoln Place in response to my question on price, the proprietor made a comment about women ,trying to be jokey I guess.
THen his assistant said: “Want me to beat her?”and chuckled.
I could hardly believe it.
“Excuse me…what did you say?”
“oh…maybe I should get my whip…ha ha”
“THis is not amusing…joking about violence against women is not funny….it’s offensive and you are out of line”
He got very tense, stopped laughing and the owner stepped in and apologized, then the staff member who said it apologized …
In the past weeks while this current renovation has been underway some of the comments made by folks interviewed:
“Don’t need to worry your pretty little head about that” (not hired)
“You look so delicate”(not hired)
“Oh you seem like you have a brain and know what your are talking about” (lol NOT HIRED this guy had the thickest Bensonhurst accent imaginable)
“linda…sweetheart”(not hired)
One friend shared that a contractor actually made a physical pass at her while she interviewed him for roof replacement…this woman owns a couple of apartment BUILDINGS plus her own brownstone…she was mortified and he was not hired.
This is not everyone but the lack of awareness is common enough amongst contractors’& vendors’ and prompted this post.
thanks for posting your experience. As so much of this blog is about fixing things,it is only to be expected that the subject of this kind of treatment comes up.
There is a wide range of sexism, varying from the :”don’t you worry your pretty little head about it” to the incredibly offensive violent quote about the whip. And perhaps you can only understand it if you have been the subject of this behaviour. Being called a faggot is less threatening if you are not one, but if you have experienced violence because of it, it takes on a different meaning. Dealing with sexist behaviour is not funny for most women.
Working around high end (union) contractors and engineers all day, I agree w eman there is a culture of teasing and fun. It comes from sometimes having your life on the line and your life can often depend on your co-worker. This culture is part of bonding with co-workers who if they do a bad job can cost someone their life.
Having said that sometimes it can go over the line, the whip comment certainly did. You were right to protest.
But if you base your hiring decisions on rejection of this blue collar culture, let’s hope you don’t end up with the most sensitive yet unskilled contractor in Brooklyn.
Respect in the trades is earned, not given. Snappy did the right thing, she ribbed back, pushed back, and earned respect. Try it.
Don’t think that contractors automatically think guys are smart and ‘girls’ are stupid; any contractor can find out what the client knows in a couple of sentences.
This is a phony post. I am so sick of them. The Forum, which used to be really good, has become a silly place full of posts by the same idiot. This idiot has multiple identities and is a la the jackass troll who used to use all of his (I am sure it is a dweeby creepy guy) puny brainpower to suck brownstoners into stupid discussions on things like Prospect Lefferts Gardens. Are you the same jerk who posts endlessly on bedbugs? Really, tell me Brownstoners if I am wrong.
I have had similar experiences. I try to twist the situations to my advantage though there are times where you just can’t play along.
But what’s annoying is the assumption that I don’t know, understand, or can’t do anything myself. And the few that recognize that I know what I’m talking about say stuff like “you must have done your research” or, if they want to put me down, they insinuate that I have gleaned information from magazines or tv shows (since that’s the ONLY way a FEMALE can know ANYTHING, right?). Often I ask questions, and the reply shows that THEY have no clue! It’s a constant struggle to find competent people (but this is everywhere).
I design and build furniture for fun. When I first began going to the Home Depot on Hamilton Ave., the male workers were shocked and openly doubtful of my ability to wield a power tool or actually build an item of furniture. They were clearly hesitant to sell me tools or wood. My first instinct was to curse them out and call them everything but a child of God. Instead, after taking some ribbing for a while, I made them a bet. I told them that I’d come back in 3 days with a photo of the piece I built and they’d have to stop teasing me. I showed up again at the appointed time and showed off the photos of my spiffy new bookshelves and they were stunned. Now when I go to HD, they smile and greet me warmly, but most importantly, with respect. I think on one hand you need to have a bit of a sense of humor about narrow minded nimrods while at the same time demanding respect. Good for you for saying something to the men. Just remember, in the grand scheme of things they are just tiny gnats on your life’s radar and what they say/do is best taken with a grain of salt.
Our main guy has been teasing my husband, “Why are you so quiet? Why don’t you say anything?” but then also was joking around that I don’t know how to do demo, and my husband does.
eman, you are being too defensive. I don’t think it is right you were called a maricon and Argentina has a point. Nothing changes unless it is brought to attention.
I have been pleasantly surprised to find the vast majority of people I deal with treat both me and my husband with respect. Everyone has been great.
I am starting to realize that most contractors and subs deal mainly with women and see this as the norm.
If I remember correctly, one of our electricians said it’s usually the women who do home renovations. My husband took an NHS class in hiring subs, and the teacher said it’s a shame more men don’t get involved because in his opinion workmen more often try to take advantage of women.
We were both charmed and amused when the boiler people told me to consult with my husband before giving them a final decision about the installation, and sent us the bill in his name, since they had spoken only with me and my husband knows even less about boilers than I do (and I know nothing). But it was sweet of them. My favorite new words are “let me check with my husband first” because it gives me a little time to think.
the guy was a silly schmuck..do you really think that he was being serious or just trying to lighten up his intensely boring life behind the counter in a supply house