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  1. “A sore throat and wobblyness which is getting worse by the minute.”

    Sounds like the 9 months I spent in the womb subsisting on Doral cigs and vodka.

    Feel better and see you later!

  2. “that’s so handy!! i usually make airplane noises.

    The Cantonese for jerking off is “Da fei gei” which literally translates into “Shooting Down Airplanes.”

    This is all super funny.

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