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  1. There was a guy on the subway today who looked exactly like Alfred Hitchcock. I also tried the subway surfing and found if one bends the knees slightly, faces forward, places the feet at a 90 degree angle to each other (spread apart by approximately 22 inches), and fully extends the arms for balance, it really helps. Given I was doing this in my monkey suit, it also seemed to provide some entertainment to my fellow riders.

  2. I was summoned? I am NOT a queen, nor am I nearing 100 years old, and I most definitely do NOT have a receding hairline. That was a perfect definition of “yar” cobblehiller.

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