Open Thread


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  1. You were so ugly at birth, your parents named you Shit Happens.

    You’re so ugly, when you walk into the bank they turn off the cameras.

    You’re so ugly, you went to a haunted house and came out with an application.

    You’re so ugly, when you were born they put tinted windows on your incubator.

    You’re so ugly, when you were born the doctor took one look at you and slapped your parents.

    You’re so ugly, you stuck your head out of the car window and got arrested for mooning.

    You’re so ugly, you have to Trick or Treat by phone.

    You’re so ugly, when your mother went into labor your father went into shock.

    You’re so ugly, when we play peek-a-boo – first I peeked, then I booed.

    You’re so ugly, they call you Taco Bell, when people see you they run for the border.

  2. “ET has the Staples “Easy button” on her forehead.”

    DIBS, this is a Cobble roast, or did you not get the memo?

    Oops, the memo was on a Post-It Note that I used to clean my teeth. Never mind…

  3. So do shoelaces, like the kind that come with wingtips.

    Posted by: infinitejester at March 12, 2010 3:18 PM

    …yeah, but that heavy shoe dangling there is just gonna cramp you’re style.

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