Stevie- I’ll need you to send me pictures (professional head and body shots) and then there is an entire approval process which involves darts, sticky notes and jurying by cobble, snaps, arkady, THL, Noki, Montrose and Cgar (to whom I am emarried). You will also be required to send samples of the apparel you will be wearing, what brand of cologne, a doctor’s note, the name of the guy who does your hair weave and a note from your mother. 🙂
Oh- and a financial statement or paperwork from the NYS Dept. for the Homeless.
“I had heard a story about a dog who began growling, snuffling and occasionally barking at his ‘mother’s armpit. Turned out, she had a tumor. Dog may have saved her life.”
Yup, there are dogs that can detect if you have cancer by sniffing your breath and by sniffing lesions on your skin. They can detect the biochemical markers.
There’s a cat that ‘works’ in a nursing home in Rhode Island that walks through the ward and can actually sense when a person is about to die. He’ll lay down next to them within 4 hours of when they’re about to pass away.
When I came down with E coli about a year ago my cat J-Kun was so unnervingly clingy and meowing loudly at me for about an hour before I blacked out that I was actually getting really annoyed by him. I didn’t even know at that point I was sick yet. Little did I know that within the hour I’d black out while trying to make it from the bathroom to my bed. He screamed in my ear and licked my face furiously until I woke up. For the next 3 days he followed me everywhere and would hiss at any of the other cats tried to get on the bed next to me. I was his patient and he wasn’t letting any of the other staff interfere.
Expert Mom just called to discuss what we’re going to make for Christmas dinner. She threw out lots of options. She then asked what is traditionally made for Xmas? I told her not to be intimidated by Waspy Neanderthal people that migrate from Canada and Gay Asshats that live in the ghetto. We’ll make what WE LIKE TO EAT (even if it’s ethnic)!!
“Where are the new offices?
Posted by: Arkady at December 7, 2009 11:50 AM”
Just down the road near Tower Bridge – sounds more romantic than it really is.
“And can we charge them to the Family???
Posted by: CGar at December 7, 2009 11:50 AM”
Everything goes through Vinny the accountant.
“chicken, as long as you don’t have to report to some tool like Biff!!!!
Posted by: daveinbedstuy at December 7, 2009 11:56 AM”
Dmn – that secret got out quickly….
Oh, the other good news is that the DSTO also gives me a non-contributory pension! Hooray for the civil service!
Did anyone see Gossip Girl: Staten Island on SNL? One Staten Island guy turns to another and says: “I like your shirt. No homo.” It was pretty funny, though nowhere near as funny as the opening scene with the Salahis or Tiger Woods’ press conference.
What can I say, I know how to make an entrance.
[cracking the whip]
Stevie- I’ll need you to send me pictures (professional head and body shots) and then there is an entire approval process which involves darts, sticky notes and jurying by cobble, snaps, arkady, THL, Noki, Montrose and Cgar (to whom I am emarried). You will also be required to send samples of the apparel you will be wearing, what brand of cologne, a doctor’s note, the name of the guy who does your hair weave and a note from your mother. 🙂
Oh- and a financial statement or paperwork from the NYS Dept. for the Homeless.
“I had heard a story about a dog who began growling, snuffling and occasionally barking at his ‘mother’s armpit. Turned out, she had a tumor. Dog may have saved her life.”
Yup, there are dogs that can detect if you have cancer by sniffing your breath and by sniffing lesions on your skin. They can detect the biochemical markers.
http://tinyurl.com/33evbe
There are also seizure dogs. They are trained to sense when their owners are about to seize and will lay down on top of them.
http://www.epilepsy-cf.org/seizure_dogs.htm
There’s a cat that ‘works’ in a nursing home in Rhode Island that walks through the ward and can actually sense when a person is about to die. He’ll lay down next to them within 4 hours of when they’re about to pass away.
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/19959718/
When I came down with E coli about a year ago my cat J-Kun was so unnervingly clingy and meowing loudly at me for about an hour before I blacked out that I was actually getting really annoyed by him. I didn’t even know at that point I was sick yet. Little did I know that within the hour I’d black out while trying to make it from the bathroom to my bed. He screamed in my ear and licked my face furiously until I woke up. For the next 3 days he followed me everywhere and would hiss at any of the other cats tried to get on the bed next to me. I was his patient and he wasn’t letting any of the other staff interfere.
Never underestimate your animals.
“hot in a stern way and exudes discipline!!!”
And ET arrives on cue!
Afternoon, Asshats!
Expert Mom just called to discuss what we’re going to make for Christmas dinner. She threw out lots of options. She then asked what is traditionally made for Xmas? I told her not to be intimidated by Waspy Neanderthal people that migrate from Canada and Gay Asshats that live in the ghetto. We’ll make what WE LIKE TO EAT (even if it’s ethnic)!!
“Where are the new offices?
Posted by: Arkady at December 7, 2009 11:50 AM”
Just down the road near Tower Bridge – sounds more romantic than it really is.
“And can we charge them to the Family???
Posted by: CGar at December 7, 2009 11:50 AM”
Everything goes through Vinny the accountant.
“chicken, as long as you don’t have to report to some tool like Biff!!!!
Posted by: daveinbedstuy at December 7, 2009 11:56 AM”
Dmn – that secret got out quickly….
Oh, the other good news is that the DSTO also gives me a non-contributory pension! Hooray for the civil service!
Did anyone see Gossip Girl: Staten Island on SNL? One Staten Island guy turns to another and says: “I like your shirt. No homo.” It was pretty funny, though nowhere near as funny as the opening scene with the Salahis or Tiger Woods’ press conference.
>>cobble kinda reminds me a little of Nurse Ratched!!!!!
oooooohhh! nurse ratched is hot in a stern way and exudes discipline!!! Stevie likes!
“chicken, as long as you don’t have to report to some tool like Biff!!!!”
Actually, I’m quite pleased with the tool to whom I now report.
[no homo]