Renting to a Friend
Hello, all. I’m about to close on a 4-family home in Prospect Heights (yey!). One of my best friends who really likes the neighborhood has asked me if she could rent one of the units. While I know that she would be a great tenant (during the 11 years that I’ve known her, she’s always…
Hello, all. I’m about to close on a 4-family home in Prospect Heights (yey!). One of my best friends who really likes the neighborhood has asked me if she could rent one of the units. While I know that she would be a great tenant (during the 11 years that I’ve known her, she’s always been very responsible), I worry about introducing the landlord/tenant dynamic into our relationship. She doesn’t understand why I think it would be a problem. Does anyone on this forum have any opinions or suggestions? Thanks!
All I can say is:
Think about the RICARDOS and the MERTZES in “I LOVE LUCY”
Howard
I can speak from experience and second what Montrose said. As a tenant I had to be very clear with myself, first and foremost that the most important thing to realize is this house is MM’s investment, not mine. As a friend and tenant my priority is to make sure I do nothing to jeopardize that. I can’t say I separate our friendship from the LL/tenant relationship but then again if I screwed her over, i wouldn’t be a friend. When it comes to renting, I am a tenant with a lease. I won’t say being friends doesn’t affect that (I make her feed me lunch almost every day), but certain things are sacrosanct. I pay my rent on time. If she says she needs an increase, I accept it- I know she wouldn’t ask if it weren’t important.
More than all that, I am living in a place where I know a friend is close by, and we are mutually supportive. When you live alone it can mean everything. She does cut me slack on occasion and in return I try to help around the building and I fix what I can in my apartment myself. I also allow her the honor of giving me lunch, and often dinner, letting me watch rented movies on her TV, and allowing me to use her washer/dryer 🙂
Just be completely honest and upfront with each other about your expectations and your needs. Neither one of you should take the other for granted and if needs be, put it in writing. A friend will understand this part of your relationship needs to be legally and professionally defined and that both of you will adhere to that. If stuff happens and one or both of you mess up, (and sadly that can happen), you’re at least protected. If it works, its the best.
As always, Montrose is spot-on and sagacious. I’ve been renting to friends for several years, and after several early mistakes, it’s been going very well. You just have to be clear and upfront about it, and have everything in writing.
I have over 15 apts in 5 buildings in Brooklyn and have owned rentals for over 11 years.
I have a good relationship with all my tenants. I even go out on occasion to restaurants with them and some have invited me to go on their vacations. I throw a “residents party” in one of my tenant’s apts once a year during the summer so they get to know each other.
In fact, one happens to be a personal injury lawyer. Also, 1/4 my residents are Lawyers.
It’s a matter of separating out your personal from your business.
The way I think of it, if you have a friend who is renting, and you explain why you need to raise the rent for what ever the reason and it is legitimate… increased heating, taxes, etc. then a friend would be agreeable to the increase. If not, then what kind of friend is it?
However, if you give no explanation, then your friend may believe that you are just raising the rent because of greed. I also make it a point to always raise rents. Even in years where I don’t need the extra cashflow, I will ask for a 1% or 2% raise, giving specific dollar increases or maintanence costs, expense increases, etc. I also always compare my market rent increases to the DHCR increases and let my tenants know that I’m here to support them should my rental increases are below the DHCR increases for that year.
I will also say that now that we are in a severe downturn, all my tenants are staying put mainly because they have a wonderful relationship with me. I take care of my residents (notice, I don’t call them tenants) and they in turn feel a loyalty and know that many other landlords will treat them more like tenants and not residents or customers.
It’s wonderful to be in a housing down turn where rents are dropping but my rent roll still moves up overall.
What’s funny is now that the weather is really crazy, I remembered last winter it snowed twice in 1 day, I went over to shovel the snow on one of my properties on the 2nd time it snowed that day. Really weird weather.
The Husband of a couple came out of my building and told me his wife fell down while walking out the building earlier, before I had a chance to clear the snow the 2nd time that day. He laughed hard when he remembered it and thanked me for being such a great landlord for shoveling the snow. His wife was perfectly fine as she fell on her bum and that everything is ok with her!
I can only imagine what would have happened had the residents hated me. How much money do I actually save in defending myself or even losing a personal injury lawsuit because the Judge is sympathetic to tenants? How much stress in my life as a landlord is minimized by just being nice and doing what I am suppose to do?
I look back at a lot of these small incidents and I say to myself, I’m glad I’m a customer oriented, relationship oriented LandLord.
Also, because I have a lot of Lawyers in my building, they will tell me when I have a possibility of negligence. I immediately address and take care of the problems. The way not to get sued is just not to be negligent. Residents who are lawyers can be incredibly helpful.
But I’m sure most landlords will not agree with me, though I really don’t know why. It would be nice to hear from both tenants and LandLords.
As many people here know, I rent to my friend bxgrl, who I’ve known for over 20 years. It couldn’t have worked out better. We were both worried that the landlord/tenant situation could affect our friendship, but it has only strengthened it. She has a lease, and we early on laid out parameters on what was cool and what wasn’t. We stay out of each other’s hair and personal spaces, which was our biggest worry. She knew going in that I don’t have a lot of money, and has been very understanding about certain improvements that I just can’t do right now. Fortunately, my 2 rental units are both in better shape than my part of the building, because a previous owner upgraded the rentals, not his/my space.
At any rate, I’m glad someone I know and trust is here in the building to keep an eye on things when I’m gone, accept packages, etc. She feeds my cats when I travel, and I do the same for her. While you never know what’s going to happen in life, regarding even the most highly recommended tenants, it’s still easier with a friend.
They are taking risks on renting from friends, too. A friend could be getting a landlord who ignores their legitimate needs, thinking they can wait forever, or expects too much of them, or is otherwise awful. Being a landlord is hard work and responsibility. I wouldn’t automatically accept or reject a friend. You have to take the time to have an honest conversation with them, draw up everything as legally as with any tenant, and proceed from there.
I have to disagree with most of the responses. As new landlords–we ultimately rented to a close friend of mine. We’ve known each other for 10 years. Although I wondered the same things that you did–I was very clear that our number one priority was using the rental until as income–and we wouldn’t be compromising on getting paid for the apartment and getting paid promptly. Over a year later, it’s been a wonderful experience. We respect her space, she is a prompt payer, and the benefits of having a friend nearby are great. We couldn’t be happier.
Well, only the OP can determine whether or not it’s a risk that he/she wants to take and how good of a friend this potential renter is. I’d just say if you do rent to the friend, take the advice of Arkady, Johnny and myself. If you don’t know or still aren’t sure about what to do, err on the side of caution and take the advice of Hank, newhomer and Carl.
Don’t do it. Her choices expand daily as rents fall. If she fails to understand, she’s not really your friend. You’ve already made a mistake by buying near peak comps. Don’t fuck this up.
***Bid half off peak comps***
Hank, I respectfully disagree with you. simply because what you describe is not someone I would define as a friend but rather an associate. True friends dont do that to another friend. So issue would not be renting to a friend but be wiser to whom you grant the “good friend” label to.