Rob, how do you know about caveman ass etiquette? You can't be that old!

Posted by: GHB at January 26, 2010 10:24 PM in response to Rug Shampooing Poo

Hey Gowanusgus, was there another single family house on your block that sold this year for $1.075 mil. that isn't showing up either?

Posted by: GHB at January 22, 2010 2:13 PM in response to A Snap-Shot of Brooklyn's Million Dollar Market

I think you need an exorcist.

Posted by: GHB at January 20, 2010 1:46 PM in response to No Hot Water Pressure

Paris is indeed "smelly", but that smell is the scent of the greatest food in the world!

Posted by: GHB at January 11, 2010 11:03 AM in response to Open Thread

Not to leave out the crazy cooks and trannies

Posted by: GHB at December 18, 2009 1:52 PM in response to Sunset Park Adventures

Phalces, I remember when the subway was 75 cents. What's your point?

Posted by: GHB at December 16, 2009 2:11 PM in response to Inexpensive Storm Windows?

Without that silly diagonal wall separating the bedroom and living room, it's a studio

Posted by: GHB at December 15, 2009 2:01 PM in response to Co-op of the Day: 251 Pacific Street, #2

What's up with those balconies? Is the view that phenomenal?

Posted by: GHB at November 25, 2009 4:58 PM in response to Development Watch: 113 South 6th Street

"how do people like grandma's addict deal with bedbugs and stuff? "

*rob* I don't think Grandma's Addict really cares!

Posted by: GHB at November 18, 2009 2:11 PM in response to Coming to Bergen: Mid-Century Furniture Dealer

Any word on using Squibb Park as an entrance? I had heard that it was not going to happen, but it really would be the best thing to connect the Heights to the park.

Posted by: GHB at November 13, 2009 12:23 PM in response to Brooklyn Bridge Park Progress Report

I kinda like it. It doesn't look like any number of monstrosities they've been slapping up all over Brooklyn these past few years. Good job!

Posted by: GHB at October 2, 2009 5:43 PM in response to The Venetian Unveiled

"Give Precious the hose!
Modsquad, the owner should be hosed, not the dog.

Posted by: GHB at September 25, 2009 2:07 PM in response to Dog Pooping in Front of House

Reminds me of the tumor brownstone in Carroll Gardens

Posted by: GHB at September 25, 2009 11:42 AM in response to Horror Show Friday: 1715 11th Avenue

"The kitchen is also tastefully done"
OMG... You actually like a kitchen?!?!

Posted by: GHB at September 21, 2009 1:20 PM in response to Co-op of the Day: 242 Baltic Street, #17

I thought Barbara Stanwyck was the most famous Brooklynite!

Posted by: GHB at September 17, 2009 2:22 PM in response to Jay-Z Slept Here

If you look at the house on Google Maps, the front with that massive wall is truly hideous. I kinda like the house itself, but that wall just looks ridiculous without a moat...

Posted by: GHB at September 4, 2009 4:59 PM in response to Bay Ridge McMansion

I'm offended by Rob calling the little boy a "midget butler" only because he's obviously dressed inappropriately for the job!

Posted by: GHB at September 4, 2009 2:24 PM in response to Brooklyn Sales: Under a Million

You're not a cougar...you're jailbait!

Posted by: GHB at September 4, 2009 11:41 AM in response to Adventures in Advertising

That's not a house. It's a fortress!

Posted by: GHB at September 4, 2009 11:09 AM in response to Bay Ridge McMansion

See if the wine made from the next grape harvest can offset the cost of repairs. Cheers!

Posted by: GHB at September 3, 2009 2:06 PM in response to Grape Vines and Brick

You hate the kitchen. There's a surprise!

Posted by: GHB at September 3, 2009 1:22 PM in response to House of the Day: 790 Rugby Road

...and I like the turquoise overload bathroom!

Posted by: GHB at September 1, 2009 5:08 PM in response to House of the Day: 694 East 17th Street

Have you ever, even once, actually liked somebody's kitchen reno? Ever? Once?

Posted by: GHB at September 1, 2009 2:02 PM in response to House of the Day: 694 East 17th Street

Horses and peacocks are scary? Clowns and marionettes scare the bejesus out of me!

Posted by: GHB at August 11, 2009 9:13 PM in response to Tuesday Blogwrap

"The thing is my apt. isn't bad at all- its just the common area that is the problem."

Diemond, it's just a matter of time before your apartment, nice as it is, is affected by this neglect. You should really tackle this issue right away.

Posted by: GHB at August 7, 2009 2:04 PM in response to Landlord Neglected Building

"you do seem a little neurotic and naive. Any building can have mice, bugs(roaches),etc. Did you grow up/always live in some highrise apartment or something?"

Why the nasty responses? The Count was just asking for your thoughts and experiences with garden level living. Jeez!

Posted by: GHB at August 6, 2009 11:59 AM in response to Garden Apartments & Pests

That building alone could stop a clock, rendering the clock useless. That's seriously fugly to the nth degree. Somebody posted a pretty nice new residential building last week. Too bad there can't be more of 'em in Brooklyn.

Posted by: GHB at August 6, 2009 11:51 AM in response to Aesthetically-Challenged on Columbia Street

Biff, it's Slim Pickens who rides the bomb

Posted by: GHB at August 3, 2009 11:21 AM in response to Fight to Landmark the Home of Nathan's

I just wanna say "momofuku"

Posted by: GHB at July 23, 2009 3:20 PM in response to StreetLevel: Breakfast Joint Opening in Garden Cafe Space

You're so lucky you have a garden. I have a potted cactus!

Posted by: GHB at July 23, 2009 1:09 PM in response to Prospect Heights Garden Build: Laying the Groundwork

"isn't there such a thing as over doing it? it ain't Versailles honey...it's a 20x10 plot."

ftgreenepark, jealous much?

Posted by: GHB at July 23, 2009 11:43 AM in response to Prospect Heights Garden Build: Laying the Groundwork

Gary Cooper... The REAL Gary Cooper was a gentleman and a fine actor. You, sir, are a douche!

Posted by: GHB at June 15, 2009 2:25 PM in response to House of the Day: 1094 Park Place

Lincolnslope, wouldn't that be awesome for Halloween?

Posted by: GHB at June 12, 2009 11:55 AM in response to Brooklyn Sales: Under a Million

Northsloperenter, the long lines at Whole Foods actually move faster than almost any other grocery I've been to

Posted by: GHB at May 28, 2009 1:21 PM in response to Whole Foods Rumor Bites the Dust

Jeez dude... don't you ever STFU?

Posted by: GHB at May 22, 2009 8:30 PM in response to Closing Bell: The Flea Will Be Buzzing

Have a great trip! The Amalfi Coast might just be the most beautiful place on earth... (Make sure you hit Pompeii and Paestum while you're there)

Posted by: GHB at May 21, 2009 4:31 PM in response to Closing Bell: Amalfi Coast, Here We Come

"You know what I mean, dumbass."

Can we please stop with all the nasty name-calling? Douchebags!

Posted by: GHB at May 20, 2009 10:51 AM in response to LPC Sends Arby's Back to the Prep Station

Rob, the pole needs to be metal...

Posted by: GHB at May 15, 2009 3:28 PM in response to Dressing Up Montague Parking Meters

I've got Traveler's

Posted by: GHB at May 12, 2009 11:35 AM in response to Can't Get Insured Near Water

Couldn't they have cleaned up a little before posting pics? TV area is a mess

Posted by: GHB at May 11, 2009 2:25 PM in response to Co-op of the Day: 101 Lafayette Avenue, #17C

Montrose, I'm really enjoying your posts. Thank you. Those Romans really knew what they were doing, huh? Who'd a thunk that bricks could be so interesting?

Posted by: GHB at April 22, 2009 10:52 AM in response to Walkabout With Montrose: Build Me a House of Sturdy Brick

Too much clutter! And why hide a beautiful fireplace behind an end table? Boneheads...

Posted by: GHB at April 21, 2009 2:04 PM in response to House of the Day: 524 3rd Street

Reminds me of when Kenny Rogers moved across the street from Kramer...

Posted by: GHB at April 15, 2009 1:00 PM in response to Checking In On 110 4th Avenue

No bedroom picture? Hmmmm.....

Posted by: GHB at April 15, 2009 12:51 PM in response to Co-op of the Day: 277 Washington Avenue, #3J

If it doesn't warm up soon, prime blossom time may not hit until July! Froze my ass of walking to Ft. Greene yesterday from the Heights. BRRRRRR.......

Posted by: GHB at April 13, 2009 9:56 AM in response to Open Thread

We had a Checkers on 34th Street, near 3rd Ave when I lived in Murray Hill. That was over 10 years ago. Don't know if they're still there...

Posted by: GHB at April 7, 2009 1:04 PM in response to Checkers Checking Into 111 Court Street?

Montrose, another great post! How about outdoor gas lamps after stained glass? I keep seeing them all over.

Posted by: GHB at April 7, 2009 12:59 PM in response to Walkabout with Montrose - Wrought Iron

DIBS: "I think you're just too young to remember classic CSNY. "Southern Man??""

Southern Man was Neil Young... no CSN in sight

Posted by: GHB at April 7, 2009 10:36 AM in response to Closing Bell: Woodstock 40th Anniversary at Prospect Park?

your mom schooled me.

*rob*

Posted by: Butterfly at January 26, 2010 11:49 PM in response to Rug Shampooing Poo

Okay I know everybody is joking around and I'm being a drag by answering the question seriously, but modsquad, there's a health issue here and it would be unethical to keep that carpet I'm sorry. I don't care how new it is. Keep the security deposit in order to rip it out and replace the carpet. That's what security deposits are for - they're not to pay for your pain and suffering. Shampooing carpet makes a carpet stay damp long enough for a kind of bacteria to grow, there's actually a specific illness caused by shampooing a carpet too much making it stay damp a long time. Which is what would be required to shampoo out ground-in poop. So then you have that bacteria on top of the bacteria from the poop. Total health hazard. And a liability if your tenant gets sick.

Posted by: traditionalmod at January 27, 2010 8:23 AM in response to Rug Shampooing Poo

Seriously traditionalmod? I'm sorry you're saying that except for this one spot of fecal matter there is no other ground in poo anywhere on this carpet? This is NYC. I can't even imagine what gets "ground" into the carpet on a daily basis. FWIW this is a live/work space (sorry for my OP that was somewhat misleading) and my understanding is that someone was let go a few months ago and that was the retaliation he administered. It wasn't tar, unless they use corn and tomato seeds to make tar these days. He actually had to pull a large printer away from the wall to make his deposit.
If someone gets a E-coli infection from licking the carpet, well maybe they deserve it.

Posted by: modsquad at January 27, 2010 9:10 AM in response to Rug Shampooing Poo

Haha, it brings a completely new twist to that live/work tag.
Get rid of it, it will be cheaper than a proper cleaning. I would get carpet squares installed, and keep enough to redo the hallways ( or the occasional disgruntled ex-employee's cubicle.)

Posted by: Maly at January 27, 2010 10:40 AM in response to Rug Shampooing Poo

I love how humans get primal and it always comes down to poo in distress.

When I worked at CIGNA HealthCare (a few years back), they let a lot of people go- A LOT. Departments in the Northeast were learning about layoffs in email. Yes very classy! These emails were followed by the EAP "drinking in the workplace emails" as everyone had turned to the bottle. But some people didn't turn to the drink. Some people had better plans.

And so was born the Poopetrator of the Wilde building's womens' bathrooms in Bloomfield, CT. The Poopetrator first started with smearing. I believe the German's have a term for this called schmeirstuhl? - correct me if I am wrong.

She then went on to throwing her poo in patterns on the walls. Followed by full on soft serve in the middle of the floors. And ended on a high by writing prose in (her) own poo on the wall. This took place over the course of a few weeks. We were all openly cheering her on.

CIGNA had to hire security personal and then set up cameras outside of all the bathrooms.

Well of course this brought the brown era to end but they never caught her.

I dont work there anymore but funny enough where I do work at present, we had a smilar although simmered down incident a few years ago when a female employee wrote in her own poo on the bathroom wall. She wasnt so descreet and had to be wheeled out in a stretcher. And yes I am at another HMO.

Posted by: Ljubitca at January 27, 2010 11:46 AM in response to Rug Shampooing Poo

true Ljubitca,

...the poop response must be hardwired into the Prokaryote DNA,
even invertebrates like the sea cucumber, if teased enough will end up expelling their entire intestines at you.
(or is that...teasing your intestines with a cucumber will end up messy???) ...but I digress, the point is, left with no other means of expression, poop sometimes speaks volumes.

...as far as the dirty carpet. roll it up like a giant spliff and feed it to the nearest sanitation truck.

Posted by: Legion at January 27, 2010 2:11 PM in response to Rug Shampooing Poo

....uhhhh, substitute Eukaryote for Prokaryote ^^^^^^^up there.

carry on.

Posted by: Legion at January 27, 2010 2:32 PM in response to Rug Shampooing Poo

Ummm ... thanks for actually explaining. That is gross. (as if you didn't know). So we're talking about a spot here, not wall to wall poop grinding in?

I would consider going to a pet store and straight up lying. Tell them your brother was visiting with his great dane who ate something that didn't agree with him and now you have a situation. They have sprays for that.

Alternatively, I think Zout makes an enzyme spray. That is basically what you want, some kind of foaming enzyme spray.

Posted by: serpentor at January 27, 2010 2:33 PM in response to Rug Shampooing Poo

PS. You did say "ground in wall to wall" which sounds pretty explosive and different from one pile.

PPS. Most hardware stores will rent you a steam cleaning carpet thing. Which you can employ after the foaming enzyme spray has foamed.

Posted by: serpentor at January 27, 2010 2:35 PM in response to Rug Shampooing Poo

It seems the Brownstoner 2010 Post of the Year has already occurred in January...

Posted by: northsloperenter at January 27, 2010 2:59 PM in response to Rug Shampooing Poo