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May 5, 2009
Keyed Car Incident
A couple of weeks back a friend of mine was parking while someone slipped in and took her spot. She confronted the lady and to tell her it was her spot. The old lady stated she did not understand english. Pissed off , my friend left and found another spot 15minutes later. Yesterday my friend noticed the same lady had her signal for a spot so she swooped in and took it. The old lady comes out of her car yelling (mind you in perfect english) "WHat are you doing? I had that parking spot... yadda yadda yadda". So my friend was like "Oh now you speak English, when its your spot..." The lady goes back into her calls cusses a bit and leaves. This morning my friend's car was keyed. Obviously it was her; but it wont be enough for the police. ANy suggestions on how to handle the situation?
Comments
lesson learned was to key that lady's car after the 1st incident so she wont pull that stunt again. Unfortunately for your friend, that lady is now teaching your friend a lesson.
lesson learned. move on
Posted by: more4less at May 5, 2009 9:13 AM
One good turn deserves another. Slash her tires and hope she doesn't have a nephew with brass knuckles. Let us know how it escalates.
PS What language does she speak??? No sense in not turning this into a race/class thing. We haven't had a good one of those threads in over a week. :)
Posted by: daveinbedstuy at May 5, 2009 9:16 AM
while I'm sorry your friend's car got keyed, am not sorry that your friend acted in such a venegful way when they had the chance and stole the spot from the old lady
it's an OLD LADY!!!! - let it go
Posted by: gemini10 at May 5, 2009 9:20 AM
Who goes onto a blog to ask advice about that? Find that lady's car and F*CK it up.
Posted by: dirty_hipster at May 5, 2009 9:21 AM
Please define "old" for us.
Posted by: daveinbedstuy at May 5, 2009 9:21 AM
www.diehipster.com
Posted by: daveinbedstuy at May 5, 2009 9:25 AM
kidding aside, here's what you do if you or your friend decides in the future to fight & take a spot from someone - in front of the other driver, take down the license plate # and when that driver ask why you're taking her plate #, you say if something happens to your car, you'll look to do same to his/her car
Posted by: more4less at May 5, 2009 9:25 AM
Umm...this is Brooklyn. Some suggestions.
1. Slash tires
2. Coca Cola (or Pepsi) all over the car on a very sunny day (east paint right off). Or go for paint thinner.
3. Potato in the muffler.
I can suggest a few more sinister things to do if needed.
Posted by: Kensingtonian at May 5, 2009 9:27 AM
Can you please obtain from the lady information regarding where she went to learn perfect English in two weeks? A few posters on this blog might benefit from such a course.
Posted by: Biff Champion at May 5, 2009 9:33 AM
the "old" lady is at least 60... and the language was Español.
Posted by: guikazoid at May 5, 2009 9:33 AM
4. Sugar in the gas tank.
Posted by: daveinbedstuy at May 5, 2009 9:33 AM
Yeah Dave, that's one of my more sinister ideas. That's going to be an expensive fix.
Posted by: Kensingtonian at May 5, 2009 9:37 AM
the shitty part is my friend has lived on the block the whole life, her mother bought a home there in the late 70s! We're trying to see if this lil' old lady is new because my friend didnt recognize her!
Posted by: guikazoid at May 5, 2009 9:37 AM
If she was Spanish speaking then the extent of any retribution to further acts by your friend will depend upon whether she is Mexican, Guatemalan, Nicaraguan, Venezuelan, Peruvian or Columbian. It will range from guacamole on her hood to a car bomb.
Posted by: daveinbedstuy at May 5, 2009 9:39 AM
I'm trying hard not to laugh at the "my friend" references...
Posted by: the chicken at May 5, 2009 9:41 AM
What year and make is your friend's car? The response should be different if its a 2009 Bentley GT or if its a 1985 Caddy Brougham.
Posted by: daveinbedstuy at May 5, 2009 9:41 AM
Peanut Butter under the door handles
Posted by: dirty_hipster at May 5, 2009 9:42 AM
Brooklyn Car Wars....there oughtta be a reality show for this. Only in Brooklyn my friends! Only in Brooklyn!
Posted by: InsertSnappyNameHere at May 5, 2009 9:43 AM
If I was a malevolent chicken (which, of course, I am not) then I might recommend:
1) Superglue in the locks
2) (if you can get inside the car) milk on the upholstery
Posted by: the chicken at May 5, 2009 9:44 AM
I somehow suspect this will become 1 forum post per week as this escalates - ending with one running over the other crossing the street
Posted by: more4less at May 5, 2009 9:44 AM
How 'bout he hangs a dead chicken on her antenna, killing two birds with one stone??? Sends a message.
Posted by: daveinbedstuy at May 5, 2009 9:45 AM
banana in the tail pipe
Posted by: Fjorder at May 5, 2009 9:45 AM
Its a late 2000 ish Corolla
Posted by: guikazoid at May 5, 2009 9:47 AM
If you got a dog what I do is put dog shit under the door handles. Especially good for car alarm assholes.
Posted by: modsquad at May 5, 2009 9:48 AM
"banana in the tail pipe"
Did this just turn into a discussion of worst gay porn movie titles?
Posted by: Biff Champion at May 5, 2009 9:48 AM
"Its a late 2000 ish Corolla"
In that case, leave her alone. The poor woman has suffered enough already.
Posted by: Biff Champion at May 5, 2009 9:48 AM
I'm glad to see this was elevated to the top of the front page posts. There are few things more worthy of discussion than whether an eye for an eye gets dole out.
Wait 'till the What sees this!!!!
BTW, THE MOST IMPORTANT QUESTION HAS NOT BEEN ANSWERED...WHAT NEIGHBORHOOD IS THIS?????
Posted by: daveinbedstuy at May 5, 2009 9:49 AM
be careful slashing them tires - the force of air coming out of the puncture can make the air whistle REALLY loud. Get at least 2 tires, and be prepared to RUN. Have fun!
Posted by: bowl of dicks at May 5, 2009 9:49 AM
Too bad I am so late to this thread - everyone has already mentioned all of my good ideas. FWIW I consider sugar in the gas tank to be the best option. It will mess up her engine but she won't know why. Tough to do on a Brooklyn street though. You really have to consider which option is practical given that other people will be around.
Posted by: lechacal at May 5, 2009 9:49 AM
I noticed that many reactions are about the "old lady" aspect of it. That means that we are trying to connect the appropriateness of the reaction to something we don't really know. What if it were a totally able younger person rushing in with some reason we do not know about? What if the OP was an "old lady" herself?
Posted by: coopfornow at May 5, 2009 9:50 AM
"How 'bout he hangs a dead chicken on her antenna, killing two birds with one stone??? Sends a message.
Posted by: daveinbedstuy at May 5, 2009 9:45 AM"
DIBS, you don't want to incur the wrath of the chickens - we are legion...
Posted by: the chicken at May 5, 2009 9:50 AM
If you do sugar in the gas tank make sure you keep it brooklyn and use domino sugar
Posted by: dirty_hipster at May 5, 2009 9:51 AM
At the risk of being totally out of touch and getting slammed here - why not just take the high road and LET IT GO? If you get in a screaming match with someone crazy enough to take your spot isn't it an indicator to stay away if you see them again?? What on earth possessed you to re-engage, take her spot and think nothing would happen?? Didn't you think that might set her off? Just a thought.
Posted by: amybnyc at May 5, 2009 9:51 AM
I'm assuming your "friend's car" is the late 2000ish Corolla. What about the old lady? What does she drive??
Is your friend a "friend with benefits?"
You know what they say: "If it's got tits or tires, it's gonna give you trouble"
Also, some wise advice from an accountant: "If it floats, flies or f*^cks, rent it."
Posted by: daveinbedstuy at May 5, 2009 9:52 AM
if you think about it, this whole thing is a metaphor for Israel-Palestine relations.
So nuke the car back to the stone age!
Nah, she's crazy, leave it be ;)
Posted by: ftgreenepark at May 5, 2009 9:54 AM
amybnc, you need to get in touch with your aggression. If someone fucked with my car like this it would be so on.
A suggestion for hiding what you are doing (gas in tank, superglue in locks, whatev): a group of friends standing and chatting will attract much less attention than a single person looking around furtively. And they can give you visual cover.
Posted by: lechacal at May 5, 2009 9:55 AM
"Its a late 2000 ish Corolla"
btw - it's a late 2000ish Caddy, and I'm NOT that old, a$$hole!
Posted by: bayridgegirl at May 5, 2009 9:56 AM
Have some real adolescent fun...fill a paper bag with dog poo, set it on her stoop, light it on fire and ring her doorbell.
Posted by: daveinbedstuy at May 5, 2009 9:57 AM
Im not sure what year the old ladys car is, but its a Volvo, not too new. This friend is actually my girlfriend. :) Im out of the city right now and if it were me the old ladys car would of met my bat. The neighborhood is Greenwood Heights.
Posted by: guikazoid at May 5, 2009 10:01 AM
BRG, you NO hablas espanol
Posted by: more4less at May 5, 2009 10:02 AM
I think she should be strapped to the passenger seat, taken to a drive-in and forced to sit through a double feature of Gigli and Glitter.
Posted by: Biff Champion at May 5, 2009 10:05 AM
"btw - it's a late 2000ish Caddy, and I'm NOT that old, a$$hole!"
"the old ladys car is, but its a Volvo"
Oh forget it then, I don't have a Volvo, but a V _ _ _ A!
Posted by: bayridgegirl at May 5, 2009 10:06 AM
Good heavens! That's my hood! I'll keep my eye out for old ladies bearing keys with an evil eye :)
Posted by: InsertSnappyNameHere at May 5, 2009 10:06 AM
"fill a paper bag with dog poo, set it on her stoop, light it on fire and ring her doorbell.
Posted by: daveinbedstuy at May 5, 2009 9:57 AM"
Although I've often heard/read about this, I've never witnessed it myself.
How do you get the poo into the bag (can you train your dog to aim well)?
Also, what happens to the bag? Does the bag burn away leaving the residual poo on the stoop? Or does the poo also burn, giving off noxious gas?
An uneducated Brit wants to know!
Posted by: the chicken at May 5, 2009 10:07 AM
Back in the 1980s in Chicago I was dating this Mexican guy and he asked me to drive him somewhere so he could take a baseball bat to someone's windshield who had been giving him trouble. I did. Boy was he grateful that night!!!!!
Angel R. where are you these days?????
Posted by: daveinbedstuy at May 5, 2009 10:07 AM
chicken...she comes out the door, sees the burning bag and stomps on it. Go back to your cricket game. :)
Posted by: daveinbedstuy at May 5, 2009 10:09 AM
>>The neighborhood is Greenwood Heights.
You have trouble finding parking spots in Greenwood Heights??? Wow. Who knew?
My husband's preferred method - which is subtle yet effective - is to leave a note on the offender's windshield, held down with a brick.
Usually works.
Posted by: Stonergut at May 5, 2009 10:18 AM
Okay in all seriousness.
Let it go. There are more important things in life to worry about then a parking spot.
- BRG; A car owner who sometimes spends 45 minutes looking for a spot.
Posted by: bayridgegirl at May 5, 2009 10:19 AM
Okay - that's just weird. If you see a burning bag on your stoop, why would your first instinct be to stomp on it?
Posted by: the chicken at May 5, 2009 10:20 AM
60 isn't old.
Posted by: Arkady at May 5, 2009 10:20 AM
bayridgegirl. i agree, its not worth fighting over a parking spot, but when they cause physical damage to your car it changes everything. now deductibles have to be paid, time lost, etc.
Posted by: guikazoid at May 5, 2009 10:27 AM
Put sugar in the gas tank.. mucho mucho problems..
Limburger cheese on the exhaust...
Get the pix??
Posted by: Ben Gazi at May 5, 2009 10:29 AM
Ping pong ball in the gas tank.
It'll float around until the tank gets low. The ball will get sucked into the intake and block the gas. The engine will stop. It would take a mechanic months of tearing about every inch of the car to figure out the problem.
Or so I've heard...
;)
Posted by: christopher at May 5, 2009 10:30 AM
loosen the lug nuts..
watch..enjoy
Posted by: Ben Gazi at May 5, 2009 10:42 AM
smash out window and fill car w/ wet concrete?
also, as i understand it, the poop bag on fire requires that the door bell be rung and the person has to be home.
Posted by: werner at May 5, 2009 10:45 AM
bravado aside, in all seriousness I would probably just drop this. Too little reward (what's the upside, she stays out of your way the one additional time you are both trying to park in the same space at the same time?) and too much cost. If she goes about her day acting like this I think you can trust that her life is already pretty awful.
It's fun to talk about pranks though.
Posted by: lechacal at May 5, 2009 10:48 AM
Revenge is a dish best served cold.
Have your friend wait some time, perhaps a couple of weeks. Then employ some method of devious recompense, perhaps a water baloon filled with motor oil (should take a good hour to two to clean), perhaps the old dog poop explosion over the front hood, perhaps a bent antenna or a large dent in the side door. Nothing too big, mind you, you don't want to end up on the front page.
I had an evil landlady once. I've been enjoying periodic revenge over the past few years along similar lines, dog poop can be your friend.lol.
Posted by: Legion at May 5, 2009 11:15 AM
My glock is like an American Express card - I don't leave home without it but even I don't engage people in parking arguments because they often lead to no good. This type of behavior is just an extention of road rage. Correct, the police can't do anything but take a report for insurance purposes although you may have a case in civil court if you can identify the person that you believed vandalized your car but even that is hard without witnesses or video/photographic evidence. If I pull into a spot without realizing that someone else was trying to park in that spot, I pull out. If someone tries to take a spot from me, I let them know that I was trying to park and if they are argumentative, I just find another and don't take this behavior personal.
Posted by: Chosen at May 5, 2009 11:16 AM
pouring brake fluid on the paint job is a failry costly to repair also.
A better response would be for your friend to look inward and ask why she felt it necessary to be a parking spot warrior with a nasty old lady? Is it ever really worth it? I always find a spot, eventually, so whats the fuss? Now, some dirtbag body shop is going to take your "friend" for another ride to fix the key job. Doesnt life present enough challenges without us needlessly creating our own?
Posted by: Guvna at May 5, 2009 11:26 AM
Wow- who knew brownstoners could be so creative (or so frightening?) Leave the old lady a note on the car- tell her you have her plate number, and if she does anything else you'll report her to the police. Then leave it alone. If she doesn't- follow through.
Posted by: bxgrl at May 5, 2009 11:37 AM
What is all this measured retaliation nonsense? An eye for an eye and all that? Proportionate response just drags things out. What your "friend" wants is to end it.
Old lady stole spot - Friend stole spot - Old lady vandalized - Friend should vandalize - Old lady's turn.
This old lady is committed to winning and not afraid to escalate. So the question is, is your friend certain she'll still be walking much less able to parrot the old lady after whatever the old lady does to her next? Get out of the game, because even with the foundation poured and dry at Third and Bond, your "friend" will still fit in a dumpster.
Posted by: MaxOthermoxx at May 5, 2009 12:01 PM
Don't forget the classic drywall screws propped against the tires so the y puncture as they drive away. Particularly effective for people who block your driveway so they aren't stuck IN your driveway.
Posted by: Bklyn Fire Alarm Guy at May 5, 2009 12:09 PM
When I had a car years ago, as I was backing into it, some a*h**e pulled into it (it was at the corner) and was out of his car by the time I got out, steaming. Seeing that he wouldn't move, I yelled "aren't you worried about your f8&(*g car?". He said "no" and walked calmly away. Newish Acura, too.
So I must come across as terminally wimpy?
Posted by: cmu at May 5, 2009 12:33 PM
Wow, I feel lucky that I'm in Bed-Stuy. My neighbors actually ring your bell and ask if you want their parking spot when they're leaving.
Posted by: hancockone at May 5, 2009 12:48 PM
After reading all these posts, I almost split my sides - definitely the post of the month.
Posted by: tiptoe at May 5, 2009 12:50 PM
Ugh, that sucks. I would probably cut my losses, tho. If you didn't actually see the old lady do it, it's hard to prove, and it's always possible somebody else did it (were other cars keyed, or just yours?). Good luck and let us know what you decide!
Posted by: meerkatz at May 5, 2009 12:54 PM
just going to get a police report, file a comprehensive claim and keep eye out for the old lady. maybe leave her a dead fish on her hood. keep you guys posted!
Posted by: guikazoid at May 5, 2009 2:13 PM
chosen, how'd you get that carry permit?
People should learn how to drive. Someone stole a spot from me when I was like 18. That was the last time.
Posted by: denton at May 5, 2009 2:25 PM
Get Chosen to shoot her.
Posted by: East New York at May 5, 2009 2:35 PM
Get hold of a copy of "Serial Mom" and go all Beverly Sutphin on her. Unfortunately, Caller ID has made the harassing phone calls Beverly made to Dottie Hinkle far too dangerous, but you could probably put a leg of lamb to good use, or better yet, that old window air conditioner.
Posted by: bohuma at May 5, 2009 3:48 PM
It is a tool of the trade for me. It comes with the job.
And ENY, I don't even shoot people who take parking spots from me although I swear there are times when I want to bust a cap in somebody for doing that sh*t. I have way too much to risk. A nice big fat city pension awaits me in a year or two and I am working as much OT as possible to pad it. I am not trying to lose that. Can't work much OT if you get jammed up and assigned to the rubber gun squad awaiting charges for a bad shooting.
Posted by: Chosen at May 5, 2009 3:48 PM
"And ENY, I don't even shoot people who take parking spots from me although I swear there are times when I want to bust a cap in somebody for doing that sh*t."
Well, I'm sure it's tempting, especially when you're packing. There's a reason I chose NOT to follow my Dad into law enforcement, and the possibility of shooting someone in anger was just one of them.
Posted by: East New York at May 5, 2009 3:55 PM
Actually, ENY, carrying gives you a greater sense of responsibility, and a realization of your duty, which is to walk away from altercations. 'Duty to retreat', under the law.
Posted by: denton at May 5, 2009 4:56 PM
You hit the nail on the head Denton. Kind of anyway. I do not have a "duty to retreat" if I am faced with deadly physical force or any other force for that matter but it is the smart thing to do especially when no one is being threatened. However, seeing how small situations can easily escalate, it is best to just walk away. Even if the shooting turns out to be justified because the person pulled a knife on you, how would you sleep at night knowing that you shot somebody in an incident that started out as an argument over a parking space? I work with a**holes who don't realize this and after being suspended once for stupid off-duty incidents, they usually smarten-up. If not, they don't generally last too long.
Posted by: Chosen at May 5, 2009 5:13 PM
"Actually, ENY, carrying gives you a greater sense of responsibility, and a realization of your duty, which is to walk away from altercations. 'Duty to retreat', under the law."
I understand...it's too bad that's not always the way things go down. But we're talking about human beings here.
"Even if the shooting turns out to be justified because the person pulled a knife on you, how would you sleep at night knowing that you shot somebody in an incident that started out as an argument over a parking space?"
It's refreshing to hear an officer talk this way. All in all, I respect police officers because I know first hand (through my Dad) how difficult the job can be. I'm not sure what kind of person I'd be after years of dealing with a**holes (both on the force and among the criminal and civilian population). Truly a difficult calling.
Posted by: East New York at May 5, 2009 5:56 PM
this thread is so fun!
Posted by: CGmodern at May 5, 2009 7:01 PM
Parking in Brooklyn is a competative sport-- Park faster!
I haven't lost one in decades!
I'm amazed that for a small thing such major 'revenge' is plotted! Damn! Remind me not to tick you off!
You are seriously P.O.'d to do thousands of $$ worth of damage! It's only a parkin spot! You don't need to go nuclear to kill a fly if a fly swatter will do...
Let it go this time.
She does it again, THEN take action. Take the air out of her tires, or... my fav-- back into her (watch her face as you hit her!!) and say, in your best 'church face', "OMG, when did you get here? You must have seen me realigning my car-- Hey, you weren't trying to take my spot were you??Good thing we both have insurance, right?" Butter wouldn't melt in your mouth!
She won't do it again, to you! Some things are worth the cost. Actually, you won't get arrested for that one, either. Insurance stuff only. You do major damage to her car on purpose, and, you just might get arrested...
Posted by: Brooklander at May 6, 2009 11:48 PM
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