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June 11, 2008

Luxury, Brighton Beach Style

Here's what you can get in Brighton Beach for the price of a historic brownstone: A penthouse condo at the Oceana complex. Oceana is a gated community with amenities like a fitness center and indoor and outdoor pools. $2 mil will nab you the 2,200-sf unit pictured above, which has three bedrooms and two baths. Common charges=$1,400. According to StreetEasy, this listing doesn't even represent the most expensive unit in the development, which is made up of seven buildings: That honor goes to a $2.7 million penthouse that's also on the market.




Posted by Gabby at 11:00 AM | Comments (72)
Categories: Brighton Beach, Condos

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Comments

Wow, can I just buy the furniture and draperies? I think a big beach fire would be lovely, don't you?

Posted by: LM at June 11, 2008 11:07 AM

Someone was looking for a Russian bath house yesterday on one of the threads....

Posted by: Bold type guest at June 11, 2008 11:09 AM

Russians have the worst taste.....

Posted by: guest at June 11, 2008 11:12 AM

Hard to tell much about the kitchen. Form that picture doesn't look like much counterspace and it's laid out on such a long axis.

And that decorating- omg.

I wonder how a gated community is going to work in Brooklyn? I really don't know much about them- does that mean it's a complex with a fence and a security guard? does it close off public streets within the complex?

Posted by: bxgrl at June 11, 2008 11:14 AM

You're pretty much required to be Russian to live in this complex. Been there a few times. Nice place, but trashy in that only-the-russians-can-pull-it-off type way.

Posted by: guest at June 11, 2008 11:29 AM

This place has been around for a while (I don't know about this listing in particular) but I've heard the construction is poor.

Posted by: guest at June 11, 2008 11:31 AM

Looks like Nureyev's old apartment at the Dakota.

Posted by: guest at June 11, 2008 11:31 AM

Ok, as a Russian I take offense to that comment, poster 11:12. We don't just have the worst taste... we have the absolute effing worst taste ever! And, apparently, the badness is directly proportional to the size of your bank account. So, who can top this? Come on, I'm looking at you, Persians.

Posted by: guest at June 11, 2008 11:36 AM

"Russians have the worst taste....."

But the BEST mafia.

Posted by: guest at June 11, 2008 11:41 AM

Regardless of decorating tastes, one of the main attractions of living in Oceana is the proximity to the beach. Something that can be especially appreciated on a steamy weekend like the past one.

Posted by: guest at June 11, 2008 11:43 AM

Aw, c'mon you guys- that decorating style screams faux Versailles- where are the milkmaids with the little porcelain pails?

Posted by: bxgrl at June 11, 2008 11:44 AM

Lots of sexy blond girls named Tatyana at that pool!!!!

Posted by: Bold type guest at June 11, 2008 11:44 AM

I think the idea is to wait 'til its at least 80% occupied, then lock all the mobsters IN.

Posted by: guest at June 11, 2008 11:47 AM

I kind of like it.
Some people lie drapes.
Get over yourselves!

Posted by: guest at June 11, 2008 11:56 AM

I know- being close to the ocean is such a lovely thought. My feeling about the Oceana is that its tenants want to be totally insulated from the rest of Brighton Beach, not part of it. and those prices!

Posted by: bxgrl at June 11, 2008 12:00 PM

ahh Russia. Such lovely subway stations, such ugly living rooms.

Posted by: guest at June 11, 2008 12:10 PM

the construction was bad for the first phase of the project its much better for the new buildings. 20% of the units were sold to non russians from outside brooklyn. private access to the beach, private pool, indoor parking, gated, security doesnt sound that bad. all you have to do is buy it and renovate but talking shit is so much easier when you cant afford it

Posted by: guest at June 11, 2008 12:17 PM

I think I just found the perfect location to shoot my next Bollywood film.

Posted by: Biff Champion at June 11, 2008 12:32 PM

Biff...who was that complete moron posting yesterday on the Schmuck thread???

Posted by: daveinbedstuy at June 11, 2008 12:51 PM

I think a lot of people who could afford it still wouldn't buy it.

Posted by: bxgrl at June 11, 2008 1:00 PM

Flood insurance, anyone? If it's truly poor construction, this place will be underwater in the next hurricane.

Posted by: guest at June 11, 2008 1:00 PM

I would love to live here and walk around in my expensive track suit with my Fendi sunglasses on and bangin every hot russian chick just off the boat. Awesome. Too bad I am just a loser from Iowa and have to party with fat american chicks.

Posted by: guest at June 11, 2008 1:08 PM

bold type guest has the only intelligent comment on this thread.

Posted by: guest at June 11, 2008 1:08 PM

bxgrl: what do you mean a long axis? you mean along a wall? A wall is not an axis.

And gated means just that. Keeping everyone out. Is it really so hard to understand?

Biff: Indians have better taste.

Dave: I think that moron was you.

- What, the stupid bxgrl

Posted by: guest at June 11, 2008 1:09 PM

people wouldnt buy?
why is it 100% sold

Posted by: guest at June 11, 2008 1:10 PM

I feel very sorry for your husband/boyfriend/partner/whatever 1:09

You made such an embarrassment of yourself yesterday on the Shmuck thread.

Very sad indeed.

Posted by: daveinbedstuy at June 11, 2008 1:16 PM

Sorry you don't understand what I mean by long axis- it refers to the designof the layout, not the architecture. However walls can follow along an axis, or have an axis. You really should stop trying to play word games with me- you're just embarrassing yourself.

and yes i do know what gated means- i was asking for real working specifics which it seems you are not able to supply.

Dave- that person you were asking about is calling themselves "What, the stupid bxgrl because they don't understand that they've named themselves as What a stupid bxgrl. So since I am not What, the stupid bxgrl I must be at least a modicum smarter :-)

Posted by: bxgrl at June 11, 2008 1:19 PM

Dave, I guess your question was just answered. Time to bring out the Trollminator!

Posted by: Biff Champion at June 11, 2008 1:24 PM

Seems to be a pretty good investment of my U.S. tax payer dollars...after being laundered a few times through the new Russian economy. I new that money would show up eventually.

Posted by: guest at June 11, 2008 1:29 PM

Is there a Lukoil station nearby??

Posted by: daveinbedstuy at June 11, 2008 1:36 PM

It says private beach access- what does that mean in real terms? that Ocean has a private path to the beach or that they've made part of the beach private. I went to the website but it doesn't get more specific than private direct access to the beach. And that it is 85% Sold. I do confess that the sight of the buildings with the ocean is truly envy making. Looks like some of those wonderful Victorian turn-of-the-Century spas. It is quite beautiful.

I'd still toss the decorator off the balcony :-)

Thanks Biff! I'm working on my costume now- I think I'll go for a flocked velvet effect by using kitty litter (the recycled paper type of course). I've made so much money selling the stuff to What,the stupid bxgrl that I can hire a professional costumer to construct it. I'm just worried that the elegant pale gray color won't be dramatic enough to show up well on camera.

Posted by: bxgrl at June 11, 2008 1:48 PM

"walk around in my expensive track suit with my Fendi sunglasses"

yes, you'd fit in perfectly in the bad taste living room.

Posted by: guest at June 11, 2008 2:09 PM

Forget the mint juleps on that browenstone balcony in the Garden post...cheap vodka, belly dancers, eastern European pros, balalaika music!!!!!

Posted by: daveinbedstuy at June 11, 2008 2:15 PM

wow 2:09...you really understood the point that 1:08 was trying to make.

When did they stop teaching reading comprehension in the schools? Ooops, I may not be very PC on this. Perhaps 2:09 was born in Russia.

Posted by: daveinbedstuy at June 11, 2008 2:18 PM

bxgrl, Dave and Biff are the trolls of this site.

Tell me kitty litter girl, how you call a kitchen a room with an axis. You don't know what in god's name you are talking about.

And you STILL don't understand private access to a beach? You really need to spend a little less time at Orchid Beach and get out more.

btw: Where did you go to school? You never answred that quesiton. Afraid to admit you know nothing?

And no, basement dweller, you are not smarter. You are just trash from the boogie down, the armpit of NYC.

Dave: Shame you can't sell your underwater property to buy one of these. Then again, it assumes they would want soemone so financially irresponsible in their building. How are your development plans for Bed-Stuy going? No progress I am sure since you are on this site all day posting.

Biff: I am the trollminator.

- What, the stupid bxgrl

Posted by: guest at June 11, 2008 2:44 PM

dibs - you may have it wrong. 1.08 was clearly talking of the excellent hot-chick-banging life of those who will live here as opposed to the loser-lives of those criticizing this place. 2.09 appeared to be hitting back saying - well you've still got bad taste whatever.

Perhaps your comprehension is the one that needs some work?

Posted by: guest at June 11, 2008 2:48 PM

Boy...and we all thought the What was a lunatic. Maybe this is the What's mother!!! She did fess up yesterday and say she was a woman. Would anyone here be proud if she were your mother?

Posted by: daveinbedstuy at June 11, 2008 2:54 PM

"You really should stop trying to play word games with me- you're just embarrassing yourself"

I see bxgrl is exposing the chip on her shoulder intelligence-complex again. Bless her insecurities.

Posted by: guest at June 11, 2008 2:57 PM

2:48 re-read each one of them...slowly this time!

Posted by: daveinbedstuy at June 11, 2008 3:00 PM

from the pool area there is a walkway under the boardwalk right onto the sand. its funny people talk shit but when they started selling and the sign outside said starting at 250k everyone except russians thought it was crazy the last sign they had up said starting at 550k what a mistake those russians made.

Posted by: guest at June 11, 2008 3:04 PM

My god!!!! I just opened the link to the penthouse condo (I had only opened the Oceana link earlier). That's a bathroom fit for a ?????

I can envision lots of overweight men in skimpy bathing suits and old ladies sitting around playing mahjong!!!

Posted by: Bold type guest at June 11, 2008 3:10 PM

"Tell me kitty litter girl, how you call a kitchen a room with an axis." well, since this is an exercise in futility I suggest you pull out a dictionary, take a few classes in design, and try to use your brain instead of constantly writing like a little kid with the reading comprehension of a rabbit.

You're signing yourself, What, the stupid bxgrl. Can you possibly be so uncomprehending as to not get what you're calling yourself? I mean, ok, the rest of us can certainly agree with you as to its appropriateness but your total lack of logic or comprehension is quite astounding.

why thank you 2:57! It takes one to know one :-)

Posted by: bxgrl at June 11, 2008 3:21 PM

Dave - I think you need to go rinse the crud off your spectacles. Or have a coffee.

Posted by: guest at June 11, 2008 3:45 PM

Gawd. Must it be that Dave and Biff have to make every thread all about them??

BORING.

If this completely uninteresting navel-gazing banter continues I'm out of here. Never coming back.

Posted by: guest at June 11, 2008 4:31 PM

welcom to land of racism, good job my fellow Americans ,we are the best

Posted by: guest at June 11, 2008 5:00 PM

Bold type guest, mahjong tiles and bathroom tiles, what a combo!

Bxgrl, leave What, The Stupid Troll alone. He clearly has a crush on you and can't get enough of following you around trying to get your attention.

4:31, ah, yes, we do and thanks for the shout out. We live for the attention. And thanks for adding so much to the discussion. But most hilariously, do you not realize your threats to leave encourage us even more to drive you away? Buh bye...don't let the door hit you on the @ss on your way out...

Posted by: Biff Champion at June 11, 2008 5:10 PM

Biff..if I'm not mistaken, the troll admitted yesterday, after I did a quick psychological profile, that she was a woman...which makes it even all the more disturbing!!!

As we know, 4:31 will never actually leave. Unlike many of us that have real jobs and social lives apart from brownstoner, many, the likes of him, do not unfortunately.

Posted by: Bold type guest at June 11, 2008 5:15 PM

bxgrl: answer the question. where did you go to college? What did you study?

Don't want to answer? Cause Hostos CC is not that impressive?

Since you are an expert in design, why don't you give us all a link that shows where the term long axis is used? Since you admitted that you sell kitty litter for a living, you must have picked that up from someone somewhere. Did your frineds that rent you their basement apartment teach you that?

The last line of your response at 2:57 was very mature and intelligent. Have you called Hostos to ask them for a refund on the tuition you paid? I can do that for you if you like. I think you could use the money.

Dave: You may have the time to re-read each post - since you are hear all day - but when you do you will realize you are an idiot. You just don't get it. Believe it or not, this site is not about you. Go get a second job to pay off your mortgage and start making those big improvements to your neighborhood that you talk about.

- What, the stupid bxgirl

Posted by: guest at June 11, 2008 5:22 PM

Bold type guest, I do remember that, but I'm certain What A Stupid Troll is a man. Perhaps one of his multiple personalities is a woman, but I'm pretty sure he's a man, given his panic exhibited in his post at 1:09 after bxgrl's reference to a long axis. Obviously What A Stupid Troll is a little, shall we say, lacking, in the area of axis length, amongst other things...

I suppose you're right about 4:31. Just like the faded type trolls to get us all excited at the prospect of them never returning only to lose in their fight to stay away and obsess about us. Do you think he was expecting someone to jump in and beg him to stay or actually care if he never came back? Wow, that's sad.

Posted by: Biff Champion at June 11, 2008 5:24 PM

Wow, Bold type guest, I was right! What a Stupid Troll is still obsessed with his puny axis! And maybe he's insisting on finding out where bxgrl went to college so he can dig up the yearbook and do naughty things to his short axis while drooling over her picture.

Hopefully he'll go to school himself at some point and learn how to spell "friends". Or maybe he's waiting until he actually gets a couple himself before worrying about spelling it correctly. And please tell him that it's "here all day" not "hear all day" before he starts calling other posters idiots.

Perhaps he should take his tuition money ($5.69) and pay for an improv class; his comedy sucks...

Posted by: Biff Champion at June 11, 2008 5:31 PM

So we also look down on Russians on this website now? Well at least Black people aren't alone anymore. You guys gonna start picking on the Irish soon?

Posted by: guest at June 11, 2008 5:32 PM

Now BTG and Biff- that was so laugh out loud funny!

What,the stupid bxgrl - you're sounding a little shrill there. Honestly if you want to get any real answers out of me you would have to prove you can post more intelligently than you have. I'm so sorry you haven't realized the kitty litter was a joke- even my cat got it, and in the past I have mentioned my field(s) of study but I'd rather you did the work and find it out for yourself.(again- about that reading comprehension problem you have-) I didn't post at 2:57- I answered him at 3:21 so you should have written "The last line of your response TO 2:57..."

So, really, I would try to explain to you about axes, and the arrangement of rooms and geometry, and design, but that would imply I thought you would be able to understand. I mean, if you can't even figure out how to google a reference by yourself...

I take it you new hobby is going after me, the What, Biff, BTG and Dave? Sweetheart- get a life. I know, I know- you can't wait til my friends in the Bronx kick me out of the basement which I obviously can't afford because you aren't buying enough of the kitty litter I'm selling. But while I may be a bitter renter/loser/ignorant/whatever, I still don't look half the fool you do on this blog.

Posted by: bxgrl at June 11, 2008 6:11 PM

Sorry Biff- I'll try to be nicer to it next time. :-( (I never have any fun...)

Posted by: bxgrl at June 11, 2008 6:13 PM

Good to see Biff, Dave, bxgrl and BTG all talking about me. You are the biggest bunch of losers. I can see why the What loves to post and get reactions from all of you. You are a sad and sorry bunch. Your self-absorbtion is amazing and, oddly, funny at the same time. You project your own short comings on to others you don't know and make complete asses of yourselves in the process. You have no life. So sad.

- What, the bxgrl

Posted by: guest at June 11, 2008 6:14 PM

What a Stupid Troll:

"absorption". Wanna try again? Actually, we're not talking about you; we're laughing at you. You're the butt of our jokes, dingbat. Thanks for providing us with so much material. We couldn't have asked for anything more in a whipping boy. But thanks for bringing a bunch of bold type friends together all in the name of belittling you.

Oh, and you screwed up your sign-off too, numbnuts.

Posted by: Biff Champion at June 11, 2008 6:19 PM

bxgrl, expecting What a Stupid Troll to post intelligently is setting the bar way too high. Maybe you can offer him information on you that he so desires if he says something interesting. Ok, how about if he can sign off his post correctly twice in a row?

He really wants you. Too bad he'll never get you. But the fact you called him "sweetheart" will surely have him stalking you for another few weeks.

Posted by: Biff Champion at June 11, 2008 6:24 PM

Biff- oh nnnooooooooooo. Ya think?

"I can see why the What loves to post and get reactions from all of you. " Let's see- wasn't it you on the Schmuck thread (oh I am so restraining myself here) who constantly baited the What, including finally insisting we are one and the same? Isn't that how you invented your sign-off? And if I remember correctly, The What ripped you a new one. And then, because he was being nicer than I, actually asked me to refrain from playing with you. He thought it was too cruel (I'm sorry What-I promise to be better next week).

Do you also notice how our pet is now trying to sound like us by injecting a little (oh ok condescending) humor? Don't they say imitation is the sincerest form of flattery? Or maybe What, the stupid bxgrl just looks to us for inspiration?

I may joke about it but in all honesty it makes it hard to enjoy the site when the troll stalks your every post. Not much fun for other bloggers either (except maybe Biff and Dave) :-) and I've seen a lot of the b'stoner community leave or stop posting with names because the troll makes it so hard. I stopped posting for a long time too. there's a lot of great people here and they have a lot to share. Some of us have learned a lot- and its a community worth keeping.

Now I'm sure What, the stupid bxgrl will have much to say (none of it original or imaginative or particularly witty) so I expect we'll have a few more go-rounds before I get truly bored instead of just amused.

Posted by: bxgrl at June 11, 2008 6:51 PM

Can I proclaim all of idiots? I can? Done and DONE.

Posted by: guest at June 11, 2008 7:21 PM

So the last entries Biff and bxgrl posted were about me. You just prove my point. And that you can write several paragraphs points to your frustration and anger with me. You may try to blow it off, bxgrl, but you are not amused. (Like you say you always are)

You two, Dave and BTG get on here every day and subject the rest of us to your truly stupid and useless comments, and your pathetic insults when the rest of us complain, and then feign insult when we call you on it.

You want the rest of the world to think as highly of you as you do of yourselves? That is not going to happen and this is the wrong forum for such validation.

You want to subject us all to the intimate details of your lives and thoughts and then be surprised when we rememeber what you say and hold you to it?

bxgrl, you can try to change the subject or deny what you have written in the past, but your childish retorts and "insults" don't change the fact that you don't even remember what you have already said. Do you even read what you have written or is this all about seeing your thoughts on a web site?

The sad part is that - on occassion - you all have something interesting and informative to say. But it all gets lost when you self-obsess.

If you want to start your own site, feel free. No one is stopping you. But spare the rest of us from your drivel.

- What, the stupid bxgrl

Posted by: guest at June 11, 2008 7:37 PM

you'd sound better if you weren't try to use my arguments- but have at it. Now you're simply boring.

Posted by: bxgrl at June 11, 2008 8:09 PM

bxgrl:

Those points made by What, the stupid bxgrl, were not yours.

Your sense of self-importance would be hard to believe if it weren't documented on this site.

YOU are what is wrong with this site. If you can't take the well-deserved criticism, you don't deserve to be posting on this, or any, web site.

Posted by: guest at June 11, 2008 8:32 PM

True indeed Bizarro What!

You people are too Giddy.

Posted by: guest at June 11, 2008 10:39 PM

"So the last entries Biff and bxgrl posted were about me. You just prove my point."

Interesting. But What a Stupid Troll, I couldn't help but notice how all 5 or 6 of your posts in this thread referenced bxgrl and the rest of us bold typers; every single one of them. You're the king of irony but too clueless to realize it! I guess that means you just proved OUR point...that you're totally obsessed with us. You don't post anything unless it includes us. At least we started here with posts that were on topic, which is more than we can say for you, simpleton.

It's so sad you're so oblivious to the fact you're our punching bag...

Oh, and we're subjecting you to comments you don't like to the point you have to complain? HAHA...we should care about this why? Why don't you run home to your mommy's basement and cry on her widdle shoulder you sad sad sack? Are you going to pack up your games and leave our party sobbing, fella? WAAAAHHHH!

"You want the rest of the world to think as highly of you as you do of yourselves? That is not going to happen and this is the wrong forum for such validation."
- um, wrong again, loser. Truth is, I couldn't care less what you think and your validation is the last thing on earth I care about. You're really delusional. I've never posted anything to try to ingratiate myself to anyone and you can hate me all you want.

"on occassion - you all have something interesting and informative to say."
- yes, I know that imbecile, unlike you, who has absolutely nothing to add.

"If you want to start your own site, feel free. No one is stopping you. But spare the rest of us from your drivel."
- no thanks. We'll stay right here and continue to annoy you over and over again. Because it bothers you and because we can. Why would we want to spare you from that.

Thanks again for the satisfaction you gave me by setting yourself up once more. I'm giddy every time I sucker punch you.

What a Stupid Troll. Stupid Stupid Troll. Keep dancing like the Marionette you are. And we'll keep pulling your strings, ok little guy?

Posted by: Biff Champion at June 11, 2008 10:44 PM

That is my new name: Bizarro What. Thank you, 10:39, for the idea.

Posted by: guest at June 11, 2008 10:44 PM

You and bxgrl are truly sad sacks. You guys just can't read and are so self-absorbed.

Lots of people have complained to you before about your constant self-involved posts. You don't get it and you never will. You truly ruin this site. Then again, this is all about you so it doesn't matter does it?

Do you even read what others write or do you see your names in someone else's threads and think this is your opportunity to talk about yourself again then pat yourself on the back for some inane comment?

You are really no better than the What. And yes, that is an insult.

Posted by: guest at June 11, 2008 11:00 PM

11:00- blah blah blah blah blah. You sound like a broken record.

Posted by: guest at June 12, 2008 12:08 AM

what about talking some real estate

Posted by: guest at June 12, 2008 8:00 AM

russians are far and away the most obnoxious immigrant group to invade this city. they generally have bad taste, bad manners and are bad neighbors.

Posted by: guest at June 12, 2008 8:09 AM

June 12 (Bloomberg) -- Christie's International sold 11.3 million pounds ($22 million) of Russian paintings, Faberge, military regalia, silver and porcelain in London yesterday, missing the company's expectations.
Only three of the top 10 lots and 66 percent of the 298 items offered sold. Christie's presale estimate, which doesn't
include the auction house's commission, was 13.1 million pounds to 19.2 million pounds.
The results jolted a market used to auction records. Many dealers and collectors said Christie's estimates on Russian art were too high, considering prices of other types of artworks might rise faster.
``Rich Russians aren't stupid,'' said Katya Dolgova, a Moscow-based art dealer. ``You can get a Matisse or Monet for two to four million dollars, so why spend that money on a Goncharova?''


Or a tacky Brighton Beach condo??

Posted by: daveinbedstuy at June 12, 2008 8:48 AM

11:00, we get it but we DON'T CARE what others think. Clearly you don't understand that and never will. The sooner you realize we won't stop, the better for you. Yes, keep mentioning us because every mention is another post and another chance to jump into the fray!

Posted by: Biff Champion at June 12, 2008 9:32 AM

I bet the Fabergé eggs sold right off the top.

I think the decorator bought the Goncharova though. I have no idea why really rich people think that more is always going to be more. Some of the houses I've been to, some of the McMansions being built- if it's big, if it's encrusted with stuff, and is busier than the Marie Antoinette's bedroom it must scream "TASTE!!!" If you can get your hands on a copy of a book called "The Gilded Age", about homes of the rich in Newport, the only word is omigod. And not always in a good way. For some of the Vanderbilt houses wretched excess is far more accurate. So although I think this decorator was going for the Peter the Great vibe, it isn't just a Russian thing. At least he didn't put clear plastic covers on the furniture. :-)

Posted by: bxgrl at June 12, 2008 9:57 AM

to all the russian hating posers on this site i'd like to just take a moment to rub your ignorant nose in the fact that people who were not even born in this country can make more money than your sorry lazy incompetent butt.

as someone who lives in the complex i have to say ... dont hate me cause i have more money than your sorry family.

and you can come over and suck my salty piska any time retard

Posted by: guest at July 5, 2008 9:10 PM

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