Boerum Hill's Mad Crapper Caught in the Act
The residents of Boerum Hill have been contending with an unpleasant quality of life problem recently—someone’s been crapping on the sidewalks and in people’s front yards with increasing regularity. Last Tuesday, The Daily News devoted an entire article to the issue, with Sue Wolfe, president of the Boerum Hill Association, confirming, “It’s a big problem…
The residents of Boerum Hill have been contending with an unpleasant quality of life problem recently—someone’s been crapping on the sidewalks and in people’s front yards with increasing regularity. Last Tuesday, The Daily News devoted an entire article to the issue, with Sue Wolfe, president of the Boerum Hill Association, confirming, “It’s a big problem – it’s gotten worse over the years and much worse recently.” Certain clues, most notably the location of the evidence and the presence of tissue paper, had convinced residents that the perpetrator had two legs instead of four but no one had caught the person in the act. Until yesterday. Here it is from the horse’s mouth:
For the second time in two weeks I got pooped on. This time I saw her. I live on Dean Street between Hoyt and Bond. At 6 a.m. this morning my wife heard…well peeing…she woke me up and I went to the door. We live in the garden apartment so I looked up…and saw butt – thus I yelled…”HEY MOVE YOUR ASS!!!!” This was the first time in my life that I literally meant it.
After the pooping I threw on some clothes and set out to find the poopertrator. I did not find her. But my wife did hear the woman outside while I scrambled for my clothes, she did not run, just kept talking to herself. It turns out that the infamous stoop pooper is a clearly rather mentally ill black woman with very short dreds.
It actually sounds a lot like the woman who we found giving herself a makeshift bath in the doorway of our ground floor during our renovations a couple of years ago. Does this description match with any other sightings?
Boerum Hill’s on the Trail of a Nincom-Poop [NY Daily News]
Sidewalk poop is funny.
I few years ago when CIGNA Healthcare was in one of its several rounds of layoffs I worked in the Jersey City CIGNA office when I heard about the poopetrator in the Wilde Building up in Bloomfield CT. You see poop even happens in CT. Apparently a disgruntled employee was taking a poop everyday on the floor and then smearing words on the walls with the poop – this went on for weeks until they posted an armed guard outside the womens bathroom. Poo happens in all segments of society when people have had enough and have no where else to go. When I lived in JC my mother stopped by to visit me and couldnt contain her laughter because she said there was a horsesize poop in the vestibule. This I am sure was a homeless person who snuck in and relieved themselves. Living in Brooklyn now I havent come accross any poo on the steps but if i did my anger at the poo would have nothing to do with my feelings toward the individual who dropped it. Basically no one wants to pick up adult poop and no one wants to disrespect a human being who is obviusly not well. But guys poop is nasty and it smells and if my dog didnt make it and if my future kids didnt do it I dont want to pick it up.
Wow. This sounds like a woman who “lived” on Elizabeth St. in the city over 7 years ago. She crapped and peed on the corner of Elizabeth and Houston on a daily basis. We watched her from the store I was working in. It was just when the hood was getting ultra expensive.
If you find poo outside of your “Brown”stone, you probably deserve it! The poo fairy seeks fudgy retriPOOtion, on those who have more shit in their heads than in their asses!
Get off your blogs and get lives, you potpourried pooers!
Dear Brown Hole Luvin’ Bob,
Birth is a private thing!!! Have you been taking my anal babies??? I’ve been leaving them for the Rich people on the Hill to care for. The street aint no place to raise a child. Apparently the only thing they like brown are their stone mansions. I’ve seen a woman invade my nest and drown my baby in bleach and water. Dirty Sanchezes for everyone!!! Get ready for a SHIT STORM!!!
Another child is on it’s way, I have a corn craving. Look for the Harvest Moon tonight.
Brown Hole Sally.
Hey Sally..can we set up a date or meet up sometime soon? You can poop and pee on me anytime. I have been searching for you all my life. Most women cringe when I ask them to crap and pee on me during lovemaking. I caught a glimpse of you last friday and saw your brown hole wink at me before you dropped the package of brown sausage links on my neighbors stoop. You ran off before I could lick your anus clean of excrement. Lets set up a meeting time and place.
You wont shut my fudge factory down. I’m painting your town brown!
See you all in the Elimination Challenge.
Love,
Sally
Sounds like she’s eating well..!
I have seen a lady fitting this discription taking a piss on 3rd ave and bergan. After she was done she asked me for a dollar and when i refused she told me to “f*ck myself”.lol