Chalk it up as one more reason to stick with our local public transportation absurd entertainment rivaled by no other city in the world. The music on our Brooklyn-bound F last weekend began innocuously enough, with a thin fellow plunking out tunes on his melodica (that’s a keyboard you blow into). Happy Birthday segued into The Addams Family into, well, Happy Birthday again, as our intrepid entertainer blew a medley that continued uninterrupted for three stops a pretty solid showing compared to the one-stop wonders we usually have onboard. Four stops in, however, things took a turn towards the absurd…

The doors opened and who stepped on board but the ubiquitous fellow with dreads and a backpack amp whose repertoire consists solely of Knocking On Heaven’s Door, Redemption Song, and, occasionally, that Tracy Chapman blues tune. He stood awestruck for a moment and then began muttering insults underneath melodica guy’s continuing session of “Name That TV Theme.”

As soon as Melodica Man took a gasp for air, Mr. Backpack Amp broke into, you guessed it, Knocking On Heaven’s Door. Apparently, though, Mr. Amp was so enraged that after less than one predictable chorus, he stopped the song, mumbled an apology along the lines of I don’t usually do this, and began berating the first musician from across the car, calling him an amateur and a handful of other not-so-printable names.

We initially thought this might be a once-in-a-lifetime West-Side-Story-meets-Warriors musical showdown, but a little research has shown that a bumbling panhandler and some mariachi musicians have also mistakenly knocked on heaven’s door only to receive wild reprimands. Anyone else seen Mr. Amp snap?
— Pete D’Angelo

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