Speaking of posts writing themselves, here’s an open-house report from two weekends ago from someone you all know as Mr. Minerva. We just happened to have snapped a photo of the scene outside the open house, so we’re in business:

I’ve been meaning to mention to you the craziest open house in the world. I really wish I had had a camera – and a tape recorder – for this one! It was 156 St. James, one of four super-narrow 12-foot wide houses just north of Gates on the west side of the street. The two southern ones have been beautifully restored with very high wood stoops. The two northern ones are TOTAL disasters. Property Shark puts the square footage at just under 1,700. The beautifully restored ones are probably worth about $1 million.

Number 156, however, was a DISASTER – 6′ 6″ ceilings on the bottom floor (not including where it’s even lower to accomodate plumbing drop-downs), cramped, stair-case railings made of hammered together 2x3s (bent over nails & all) and did I mention it’s cramped? One 4/5 bath (has a tub, but a 3/4 size one) and a 1/2 bath in the master bedroom – I’m talking literally a standup shower stall in the corner of the room and a sink by the bed. Nothing historical whatsoever. Vinyl siding that is falling off, etc, etc, etc. It was a total mess (filthy) and a disaster (do I need to say that again?).

The current owner paid $470,000 in 2003, but if he had done what his neighbors had done and put half a million dollars into it, he’d have a million dollar house. I nearly shit myself when I heard they were asking $950,000. The part where I wished I had a tape recorder? Many brokers in this market are quick to say that the owners are willing to consider offers. So was this guy, which briefly interjected a moment of relief into my thinking, until the broker quickly added that he was willing to consider an offer – so long as it is over $900,000. Oh. Okay. That makes all the difference!

Glad to see the bubble is alive and well. GMAP